Life with kids on a budget

I recently received this question from a friend and mamma-to-be: 

"I'm working on planning and budgeting and thought you may have some tips. I am probably staying home next year and so we are trying to cut back while I'm still looking at buying maternity clothes, cloth diapers, baby supplies, etc...so do you have any advice for me regarding shopping for stuff or pregnancy in general?"

Boy do I ever!! My husband and I have been (mostly) frugal since we got married. Our wedding was on a budget, so was our honeymoon and life together thereafter. We have always tried to live on one (Jesse's) income because we knew in the future we would have kids and would want (me) to be able to stay home if at all possible. When we found out we were pregnant with twins we realized we needed to be even more aware of how we spent our money and try to use what God has blessed us with wisely. 

We are not perfect at this! It's really hard in today's society to look at what you have and be grateful for how the Lord has provided. I struggle with this daily.


A few months ago I had taken the boys to Jesse's classroom to visit after school. It was nearing their feeding time and they were starting to get antsy as we packed up to head home. I responded to Jackson's shrieking cry with this, "Son, when have I ever NOT fed you?!" In that moment I heard the Lords voice echo that same phrase in my ear, "Steph, when have I ever NOT fed you??" He always provides for us, always:

 "But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?" (Matthew 6:30, ESV)

I am paraphrasing my response to her and taking out some personal info for anonymity. Here are some of the things we have found helpful, that has freed us up to use our money to better serve the Lord with and not ourselves:

There are not enough nap times in the world to cross everything off on my to-do list...sorry it's taken me a few days to get back to you!

Ok so the combination of Jesse being ridiculously frugal and me being a hippy has boded well for us in the area of finances. We try to make as many things as possible and fight commercialism, buying only what we and the boys need, to keep our expenses down.

1. Something you can do now is save/set aside $2-3K for hospital bills and pregnancy appointments. We haven't received all of our bills yet but kids are pricey and depending on how many interventions/appt's you need you can be responsible for several thousand. Having that money set aside beforehand is a huge stress off your shoulders when your baby comes! (A big saver for us was also having a natural birth. Epiderals are expensive and so is paying for the anesthesiologist! I didn't take any med's in the hospital, a Tylenol is even like $10/pill, and it cut down on our bill significantly. Obviously you can't help it if you need a C-section or other interventions, just food for thought.)

2. Also start living off of his income alone (if you don't already do that). We have always lived off of Jesse's income and saved mine so we were used to it but it's still a shock not having that second income.

The two biggest money-savers after babies for us have been breastfeeding and cloth diapering:

3. Breastfeeding: There's a big learning curve to it but MOST women will produce enough milk to feed their babies everything they need. I am still amazed at how my milk has adapted to feeding two babies who have already doubled their birth weight. I won't bombard you with tips or how-to's now but feel free to ask me any questions when the time comes. We had problems in the beginning with poor latches and weight gain issues so it hasn't always been easy for us but it is 1. the best food for babies, 2. comes out "pre-measured" and at the right temp and 3. SO much cheaper than formula. (jumping off my bf-ing soapbox now :))

You can also receive a free pump with your insurance. That will be your best friend to help increase your supply and when he/she starts sleeping through the night you will feel so full it'll be painful if you don't pump it out! I have a Medela and highly recommend it!

4. Cloth diapering: We bought about 40 diapers from alvababy.com. At $5 per diaper and after purchasing nighttime inserts we spent about $230 on diapers that will last us (hopefully) years and several kids. In just a few months we have saved several hundred dollars. For one baby you would only need about 15-20 diapers to get started and can add to that if you find you need more. If you're thinking you might get into cloth diapering I can give you more info on our "system". It is extra work but for us it's worth it.

5. Hand-me-downs are wonderful! We got all our big-ticket items from older cousins who were done with the baby scene We got both our cribs, bouncy chairs, swing, rocking chair, etc from others which saved us a ton. It also freed our registry up for the smaller items that add up fast!

6. Put everything you might need for the first year on your registry. People are generous and loving buying baby things. We still have gifts that are unopened because we don't need them yet but it will be so helpful that we don't have to buy them later!

7. If you can, buy baby things that aren't labeled "baby". For example, we bought a in-home wi-fi security camera to view through our phones for the boys' room for about $60. A baby video monitor is $200-250 depending on the brand.

8. DIY it: I make a lot of things for the boys. It saves us a lot per month by just making our own baby wipes out of paper towels (since we cloth diaper I'm hoping to transition to cloth wipes soon and save even more). I can give you our wipe solution if you're interested. I just made swaddle sacks for our guys and fleece hats which were pretty simple and a fun hobby in the beginning when they napped for a few hrs at a time. And they only cost a couple bucks and a little time.

9. I just encourage you to get creative and have fun! And if you're getting too stressed out cloth diapering or making wipes buying disposable is just fine do whatever works for you guys financially and don't let them stress you out. Spending $200/month on diapers for us would be way more stressful than doing diaper laundry so that's motivation for us. Jesse and I are on the same page with these things we do to save money so we are able to support each other in them. If he wasn't such a big encouragement for breastfeeding and cloth diapering it would be way harder to keep going with them. There are countless nights when we're running low on diapers that Jesse is off doing diaper laundry while I'm nursing which is so helpful! I know if there's something I can't get done during the day I will have help when he gets home and that relieves so much of the pressure I put on myself to be "super mom".

10. Maternity clothes: I wore a lot of hand-me-downs from coworkers, especially for work clothes that I would probably only wear during that pregnancy. For the rest of my wardrobe I bought from oldnavy.com. I found some great sales and coupon codes and spent less than $100 total on new clothes. My fave's are ribbed tanks (stretch really well to whatever size belly you have), skinny jeans with belly band, and low-rise leggings w/o belly band. I liked wearing maternity tanks with maternity pants then I could wear my regular cardigans over them to be dressy. That might have saved a little bit and gave me more of a variety. You can also look on zulily.com. That's a good website with discounted maternity clothes.

Friends, these are just what's helped Jesse and I stay within our budget. This is, by far, not a comprehensive list! As our family grows and changes we will learn new "tricks" and hopefully get even better at stewarding our money.

How do you keep up with your families needs while still saving money? I'd love to hear your thoughts and ideas, feel free to post and share below!